Deaths

I don't mean to be morbid by choosing Deaths as the title of this post but it best describes what the topic precisely is.

In the months that I was "away" from the blogosphere, I've heard of the demise of young guys due to HIV-related ailments and complications.  Two of those who passed away were dear friends.

One was more than 30 years old and a very good friend of mine.  He and I belonged to a Facebook group.  Before he passed away, I never knew he was HIV positive since he was full of life and ambition. Months before he died, he was in and out of the hospital because of ailments left and right. Then he expired.  I was completely speechless and shocked when I learned that he died at such a young age and I had a suspicion that he was a PLHIV.  My suspicion was confirmed by my friend's siblings, who revealed to me his status.  They told me my friend simply gave up on living and became depressed. He stopped taking ARVs, which led to health complications.  As a return gesture for revealing the status of my friend, I came out to them and we hugged each other.  It was such an emotional moment.  They would remind me every now and then to never give up like what their brother did.  They instantly became my "sisters."  We still keep in touch every now and then.

The second guy died at the age of 21. He was from the southern part of the metro. We encountered each other via Twitter as he had a poz account.  We never got to meet but we'd often chat with each other via YM.  Then a few months before he moved on, he was acting weird and complained of not feeling well.  The next thing I knew, he passed away several hours after he was rushed to his treatment hub.  I never knew the exact cause of his death but later learned from a common friend what he died of.  I will not reveal here the ailment he died of to protect his privacy and his family.  I was so saddened by his death and since I couldn't go to his wake, I had a Mass sponsored for the eternal repose of his soul.

Before my two friends died, I've been hearings of young guys dying left and right - presumably due to opportunistic infections.  Just last week, I learned that a guy in his early 30s, a model and a regular fixture in the local gay scene, died in a hospital.  I didn't know what he died of but I came across his Facebook profile.  I've seen him already - I told myself.

It is really sad to learn of young guys who have died due to HIV-related illnesses - either because they learned of their status too late and medical intervention couldn't help reverse the effects of HIV infections or worse, they didn't know their status at all.

This is where it is really important to know one's HIV status as early as possible. Like I did. And I am lucky that I survived a bout of pneumonia before I learned of my status in 2010 and thankful that medical intervention is keeping the virus in me at bay.  I am not rid of HIV but I have managed to "tame" it.

About taking ARVs

"Di ko pa need mag-ARV (antiretroviral). So happy."

So goes a tweet I read from an account of a PLHIV. I have a Twitter account but I am not out with regard my HIV status in that account.

While I am happy for that PLHIV, whose Twitter account I shall not name, that he needs not take ARVs (for now) probably because his CD4 count is still way beyond the threshold of 350, I believe that even if one's CD4 count is still above normal, it is best to take ARVs to make sure that a PLHIV doesn't contract an opportunistic infection (OI) during the lull from one CD4 test to another.

From what I know, in the US, PLHIVs take ARVs even if their CD4 count is way above the threshold. It is only in the Philippines where a PLHIV is required to take ARV already and they have remained healthy with minimal to no incidence of OIs for a long time.

I have been taking ARVs - Lamivudine-Zidovudine and Efavirenz - since April 2010.  So far, I haven't had any serious OI or health setback.

While I do understand that taking ARVs would require a PLHIV's strict adherence to taking it, "an ounce of prevention is worth more than a pound of cure", so they say.

I believe that taking ARV, along with regular exercise, a healthy daily diet, getting enough sleep, taking multivitamins, cutting any unhealthy vices like smoking, and keeping oneself happy most of the time (no to depression!) would ensure that a PLHIV's CD4 count remains high.

Terminologies clarified

In the past, I've come across news reports and people who use HIV victim/sufferer or AIDS victim/sufferer and even terms like HIV/AIDS, which are actually incorrect.

So to be politically-correct, let me mention here that there is no such term as HIV or AIDS victim or sufferer. They are called person living with HIV (PLHIV) or person living with AIDS (PLWA). This is also meant to be more humane to those who have contracted the virus.

It would also be wise to refrain from writing HIV and AIDS as HIV/AIDS or HIV-AIDS because they are two entirely different matters. HIV refers to the virus that causes AIDS. AIDS, on the other hand, is a condition characterized by progressive failure of one's immune system, thus resulting in life-threatening opportunistic infections (OIs) like pneumonia, tuberculosis, meningitis, and cancers to thrive. It's the last stage of HIV infection.

Anger and sadness

Let me just get this off my chest first.

This morning, I opened my account in a social networking site and read a private message from a friend who informed me that I was mentioned in a post of a pozzie in his blog/journal/diary whatever-you-may-want-to-call-it so I looked for the journal based on the info provided by my friend. To my utter shock and dismay, I found out that the journal writer was someone I had a heated exchange in private sometime last February about a bad kind of advice he posted in the forum on HIV and Aids of Pinoyexchange.com. Since I am more responsible that he is, I won't mention his name and the URL of his online journal at tumblr. com. Anyway, this pozzie posted a private conversation we had over at Yahoo messenger wherein I advised him to be more circumspect and careful when it comes to dishing out advice to other pozzies, especially to those who are newly-diagnosed. What the fuck!! And for what reason did he post what was supposed to be a private conversation?!

I immediately texted the erring pozzie and told him what I discovered and what I can possibly do against him for his post. His reply? "Easy easy. And cd4 mo. Delete ko na." Just that. The nerve! So I told him to think twice before posting anything that might incriminate someone. I checked his journal and the post is gone indeed.

To all poz bloggers out there, please be more careful about posting anything that might put someone, especially a fellow pozzie, in a bad light.

Anyway, going to another topic. I am saddened by the recent HIV-related deaths. I learned of three deaths in just a span of two weeks. The first one, a newly-diagnosed pozzie, died of an opportunistic infection (OI) in a hospital in the metro, the second one died in a treatment hub, and the third one died in his hometown of an OI as well. All three were in the prime of their lives when they passed away.

In the first case, I don't know if his parents knew about his status but it is presumed that his partner does. To make matters even bad after the demise of their son, the parents spent thousands of pesos for tests and the hospitalization.

As for the second case, the pozzie who is from somewhere in southern Philippines passed away in the treatment hub where he had been confined and only his partner was with him. The predicament faced by the partner of the deceased is that the parents of the pozzie didn't know about the status of their son or his death. So sad.

In the third case, a poz friend of mine called up me up last Sunday and informed me that his ex-boyfriend of 7 years had passed away in his hometown in southern Luzon due to HIV-related complications. His ex-partner had been in denial about his status and didn't undergo medical intervention.

Those were very sad news indeed. I hope they rest in peace and may God comfort and strengthen the loved ones they left behind.